People may know what a healthy romantic relationship looks like, but most don’t know how to get one. Psychologist and researcher Joanne Davila describes how you can create the things that lead to healthy relationships and reduce the things that lead to unhealthy ones using three evidence-based skills – insight, mutuality, and emotion regulation. Share this with everyone who wants to have a healthy relationship.
Dr. Joanne Davila is a Professor of Psychology and the Director of Clinical Training in the Department of Psychology at Stony Brook University. She received her PhD in Clinical Psychology from UCLA.
Dr. Davila’s expertise is in the area of romantic relationships and mental health in adolescents and adults, and she has published widely in this area. Her current research focuses on romantic competence among youth and emerging adults, the development of relationship education programs, the interpersonal causes and consequences of depression and anxiety, and well-being and relationship functioning among lesbian, gay, and bisexual individuals.
Dr. Davila is a Fellow in the Association for Psychological Science and the Incoming Editor (2016-2022) for the Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology.
Dr. Davila also is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in evidence-based interventions for relationship problems, depression, and anxiety.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at
Source: https://blogema.org
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Had a fight with my boyfriend, cant believe youtube suggested this, as it understand it is my overly-emotional-attitude prolong the problems LOL
It's great we can learn how to be in healthy relationships but there was still no answer for how we learn these skills. Any ideas?
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i agree with a lot, but the emotion regulation sounds like taking the highway to panic attacks for anxious people
احد يترجم عربي ?
Can you see beyond the limitations of your conditioning, to want to be good for someone. To need to be a positive influence because your love is genuine. Saying you need a relationship is not the same as needing to experience a lasting romantic intimate relationship with mutual love respect consideration and kindness. One is you being needy its about your selfish need. The other is about a human need for companionship and should be seen a human right.
this video is great.
The next one is the one and i wanna love him better ❤️
Thanks for the great speech. I have learnt a lot?
I’m here cus me and my fiance fights a lot :,( i need help
Never thought I would need relationship advice for my relationship but yet here I am, desperately looking for something to help
The problem I have is that I know most if not all this stuff in my head, it's just that applying it is very difficult for me.. I might be doing good for a month but eventually I'll get complacent and screw up, and I don't really know how to fix it..
This is truth! My husband and I have applied all of the above into our marriage. 7 years later, we continue to fall deeper and deeper in love. ❤️
Accept the fact that he/she is not perfect and you are not perfect as well. No one is perfect. And you can not control no one. Once you accept these, things will run smoother.????
We need to learn how to have healthy relationships and how to select the right person ?
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If i can do this in my life maybe i can make my patner happy with me but too late to me now
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Mutualities sound glorious and I bet if I could experience mutuality, it would help me master my emotional regulation challenges.
Also it's never too late ..quttin should not be in your vocabulary ever ever ever !
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Find someone you can reason with – Jordan B Peterson –
This is such a wonderful talk. As a mother this is what I try to teach my kids. Very well done???
Accountability is extremely important in relationships.
Times in Isolation this can really benefit many to make sure that you have healthy communication and relationship. Thank you for this video so people can see how to Live Full Out
Thank you so much. Yes, I agree. We need more information on how to have healthy relationships.
should be taught in high school
Thank You
Is it me and my childhood issues or do most potential partners lie in the beginning telling you they want the same things as you but once they "think" they have you hooked you see their authentic self. How do you find an authentic person? All advice is welcomed. TYIA
Pretty obvious, not helpful.
I had a very important relationship just end. At the end of it I was resentful, emotionally manipulative and used her anxiety against her. Afterwards I apologized and became needy and insecure. I needed her back. The love of my life. But the damage was done. I was a great guy before. I can't believe the way I behaved, and two months later I was in a psych ward for active suicide attempts and diagnosed with psychosis due to not sleeping from the anxiety of how I reacted to her. Ill never forgive myself. This kind of learning is ESSENTIAL. It's always too late.
I feel like all of her examples were directed at women and again telling them to tolerate put up with and be more respectful of their male partners at the sacrifice of their own needs. I would give none of this advice to a daughter of mine currently living in our culture
Omg